Saturday, September 23, 2006

Good news or bad?

Ever get that kind of news that you're not sure how to interpret? Like... on the face of it the information sounds neutral... perhaps even neutral good. Doesn't seem like you should have a vested interest in it, but at the same time you really do in a roundabout way. It's not so much a logical connection, as if A leads to B inevitably, but rather there are indirect possibilities it creates.

Namely I speak of when people become accustomed to certain arrangements. Like let's say you're away for a couple of weeks. Your best friend invites the girl you have a crush on and her current boyfriend to the weekly baseball game. But, when you come back, the girl is no longer with her boyfriend. The problem is, now your friend liked the company of your crush's ex-boyfriend, and so it's considered rude at this point not to invite them. Your friend doesnt mean harm - they're just used to treating your potential squeeze and her ex as a unit. It's custom now that both of them, as a couple in a manner of speaking, come to the baseball game. But grrr... how are you supposed to make a move if you're always around the ex!? The people involved don't really understand your clandestine motivations, and as such aren't bothering to prepare around them - in short your plan is semi-doomed, or at the very least will require a lot more mixed emotions than it had needed to when you planned it.

There are, naturally, other illustrations, but the short of it is that we're always getting used to arrangements. We want one thing, another part comes with the wanted package (sometimes unwittingly), but then that other part cuts off a third-party interest that it had not considered. I think maybe this sort of plotting is caused by greed and a certain amount of self-centeredness. Why should people take into account an as-yet-unknown third party just because they might exist in the future? It's pretty screwed up to even think in this manner, or to be offended when yo're the unconsidered third party, and even worse when you have no actual right to be included in the decision making!, but I don't think I'm the only one who does by any stretch. It's the long-term plan that can be see as being put in jeopardy - it's the end goal, some of the steps to which might be broken if one or more parties, in all the best intentions, decides to jump onto what seems like good news at the moment.

Did I take a weird pill this summer?

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